I am lost, I feel like crying,
I want to know what is the truth,
but all I can do is to persevere.
I can't break down like it ain't anyone's business,
things have to go on, I can't be so selfish.

I really don't know what to do.
Today's the schooling day, I should be happy..but Im not.
Okay, it wasn't too bad at first, we did the usual stuff in class. There were games during CD class, Mr Adrian Tan didn't teach during geog,videojournalism tchrs let us have it our way. Clara and I were eating, I was sms-ing outside on the locker, Clara fell asleep listening to her MP3 and we managed to get a time slot with joel. Even Mdm Yong the bio tchr filled the lesson with laughter and didn't scold me although I only attended her lesson for 5mins.

It started raining after school. Shared umbrella with YehYeh to the bus stop though both of us got drenched in the end.Met wanling and off to bedok to find zhenfeng.Together we went to pasir ris so that she can do her EZlink.ot myself some cottage pies which Im not supposed to eat due to my throat.It's getting worse.Anyway, zhenfeng got off at kallang to get to SBM.Actually I wanted to go back home but since there was still time, we decided to go to Bugis and walk a bit first.Saw madeline.lols.coincidence.She went to get stuff with hangqi and they saw victeo.Three of us decided to get ourselves a newbie tee each.Wanted pink initially but due to the stock they have, i took black, madeline blue and wanling pink.it's the same design and we'll wear it together during camp :)

However, as I was about to go home, saw a msg which totally put my enthusiasm down.
Brandon: Victor may not be able to come for the camp lehs..
Me: blurr...*no mood anymore*
I was totally off my high mood.I thought this enthusiasm could last all the way till camp's over. Although it's just a maybe thing, I know it's not victor's fault but Im just out of the mood.Kept thinking what I should do if this becomes a fact.the gifts for the campers are already done with both our names on it already.Mum's effort would be put to waste if it happens cos she was the one who helped me do it.My cheers are not done yet.I'll have to mug.
As I thought I remembered this particular scene in O.C this year. one eleven wasn't really enthusiastic, but nick didn't give up all the way even though many seniors have already given up.That's got to be the spirit I've to uphold.It isn't the question of whether I can or not,but rather I have to.Campers have expectations for the camp and I can't just let them down.Be it what ever happens I'll have to continue to walk this path, I won't give up..

Yar..just called to find out more.Phew.At last, i know. Thankfully victor is coming. Thank buddha for his blesses.Not stressed up anymore but the enthusiasm is something which I can't find back..haiz..i know I shld let this affect me but somehow, it did.
perseverance is the only way out..