BOO~ I am back! anyway, life over at 201 is improving as usual but I am not getting to know anyone else.DO MY BEST after eoy to bond with them.yups.qianyi and I only have until the end of this year and it is already ending.
OH yup. I haven't been doing well as I have said too many banned words.OOPS. I would work hard.make sure that I would practice until the nxt camp that not even gary or donavan gets to catch me even once.YEAH.
Sometimes I am really starting to wonder if I really irritate people too much. Or am I acting responsible? I don't care.follow up on my studies then.hahs.this really works.All i have to do is simply study study and study. I do not have to consider.byw.
I am tangled inside out. not by love, not by parents, but it is my feelings. Who are those who actually treat me well? Who are those that can sense how I feel? Who are those that are really willing to stretch their hand right down and put me up from this deep hole that I have fell in? Why is it always those that I do not value as much? Why?
I used to think that derrick, joan, donavan, sheena, kenneth, rauldah, adam, gary, stuart, sofia,cassandra, natalie, dabby, cheryl, felicia and many more from akltg... I never thought how much they actually mean to me.
During the graduation ceremony, it was donavan who showed from afar, how much he appreciated what I said.

Back in school it can be sensed that a paper so thin, has been put through to test our relationship. It is only now I know how it feels to be looked down upon. In the past it was always me teasing others, and even if I am being teased, it would not mean much harm or hurt. Am I just seeing a mirror of my past doings? My time of enjoyment is over. Until the exams are over, I would not have the chance nor energy to build it up again. Today it is Yunian who passed me the questions. It was rachel who help me photocopy the worksheet. It was Ranie who let me go to her house to revise just because I did not want to face the others in the school library. It was me who wanted to be with them, and it was also me who felt ever so thrown away into the great ocean. When I saw Yihui and WeiMann today, I did not want to look directly into their eyes. Why? I really do not know. It was as if it was a mirror and I do not dare to face it. Dare not face myself. I have not opened my mirror to look at my eyes today. I know they tell a thousand feeling and secrets.Yups. Even friends who I deemed to be the nicest, they don't even realise the change in me today. Just like how surprised derrick felt when I sensed the disappointment in Donavan's eyes.Supposingly it should be the coaches who sensed it, but why me? The same theory applies when I really do not understand why those so close to me don't get a little signal while those far away know so much. Zhanyong still angry for me not allowing him to bring fries across? it that is so, all i can say is sorry. When i am seen letting people across, I am being reprimanded. When I do not let them go, they are pissed. If he did not say that he would bring the fries across to the other side and smuggle it across, or else just put it in his pocket and go one round and out, I would close one eye. Just like a piece of ham,stuck between two pieces of bread. sometimes when the bread falls lose, I am not able to catch hold of either side. When it is pressed hard together, I am squashed. I do not want to give up council after coming so far in this probation.I must hang my way through. Meanwhile push everything aside and throw my brains into study.(: Put a smile on my face to tell others I can do it, no matter whether I can or not.
phew, i feel much better now. just back from AKLTG IAG Sept Camp Booster.
I was really angry that day. Just coming to think of it, it was also my fault. Yups. I would not ponder of it anymore and luckily gary enlighten me a bit more today; i really have to let go of him. I am going to concentrate on my studies from this day till the end of EOY. Having a sore eye though. thanks donavan and derrick(: for constantly encouraging me and believing in me. *big hug*

NOW:

today was about displine and Q&A.more people were teased, that's for sure.pretty angry as mum did not allow me to join A Academy Club and Assistant coach and IAGA Dec. I am going to prove it. Come'on. Do it.

Reward Punishment Scheme:

reward for doing well in EOY: give what it takes to join IAGA dec.
reward for sticking to timetable for 1week: get another painty
punishment for not sticking to timetable once: $5 off my pocket money;into bank + 50 pushups.
punishment for using banned words: $1/word."T-R-Y, D-O-N-'-T K-N-O-W,O-K."
If We Hold On Together(Diana Ross)

Don't lose your way
With each passing day
You've come so far
Don't throw it away
Live Believing
Dreams are for weaving
Wonders are waiting to start
Live your story
Faith, hope & glory
Hold to the truth in your heart

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Souls in the wind
Must learn how to bend
Seek out a star
Hold on till the end
Valley, mountain
There is a fountain
Washes our tears all away
Words and swaying
Someone is praying
Please let us come home to stay

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

When we are our there in the dark
We'll dream about the sun
In the dark we'll feel the light
Warm our heart, everyone

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
As high as clouds can fly
The clouds roll by
For you and I
BOO~ I m a independant girl. YES. I know what I want and I would achieve my goals.
Well, let the past go away to the far ends of the universe and let the present stay within me.
This blog is a collection of letters and reflections to myself. Yep. I do not want to lose any of the precious letters. (: I MUST study hard. I want to achieve my goal: be the top psychologist/counsellor who motivates people to achieve their goals. I am going to work hard now.(: Bye.